alhamdulillah....
akhirnya gw bisa mandi.. baru aja air di rumah gw idup lagi....
senang... aku mo mandi yang banyak....
Sunday, February 11, 2007
jakarta oh jakarta... banjir oh banjir....
gila hujan kali ini emang hebat yah. bikin semua orang susah. bukan hanya yang emang akhirnya kebanjiran sehingga ga bisa kemana2. tapi yang ga kena kebanjiran juga mendapatkan jatah penderitaan sendiri. selain terkepung banjir dimana2 sehingga membuat susah untuk berpergian, tapi kita juga kebagian mati listri atau mati air (PAM).
untuk gw sendiri seh, gw kebagian mati air. dari hari jumat hingga hari ini gw belom bisa mandi dengan benar. kalo mo mandi sepuas2nya gw harus pindah ke pondok kelapa. hiks3. air yang gw dapat selama sembilan hari ini juga di kasih ama tetangga gw. jadi tiap hari yah nungguin air, terus ngangkut2 ember ke bak mandi. huhuhuuuhu.. sempet juga nampung air ujan. tapi karena sekarang udah ga ujan, yah mo gimana. kalo gw denger dari mucil, itu kerjaannya dari awal mati air, yaitu nampungin air ujan. katanya seh mandi air ujan tuh dngin banget. gw belom nyoba seh. yah secara emang cuaca lagi dingin banget gn.
secara umum seh gw liat, banjir taon ini lebih heboh dari yang taon 2002. kalo ngeliat di lapangan yah. yang kemaren 2002 ga kena banjir, sekarang kena banjir. yah katanya seh 75% jakarta kena banjir, dari mulai kategori tergenang hingga tenggelam dlm arti yang sebenerna. katanya kan ini banjir besar yang 5 tahun sekali, 2012 bakalan lebih parah lagi ga yah. mungkin kalo ga segera di atasi, yah kira2 beberapa puluh tahun lagi jakarta tenggelam total lah...
ps: kenapa ui ga libur yah? kenapa sekolah2 yang gw tempati dari dulu ga pernah libur kalo banjir. hiks3
untuk gw sendiri seh, gw kebagian mati air. dari hari jumat hingga hari ini gw belom bisa mandi dengan benar. kalo mo mandi sepuas2nya gw harus pindah ke pondok kelapa. hiks3. air yang gw dapat selama sembilan hari ini juga di kasih ama tetangga gw. jadi tiap hari yah nungguin air, terus ngangkut2 ember ke bak mandi. huhuhuuuhu.. sempet juga nampung air ujan. tapi karena sekarang udah ga ujan, yah mo gimana. kalo gw denger dari mucil, itu kerjaannya dari awal mati air, yaitu nampungin air ujan. katanya seh mandi air ujan tuh dngin banget. gw belom nyoba seh. yah secara emang cuaca lagi dingin banget gn.
secara umum seh gw liat, banjir taon ini lebih heboh dari yang taon 2002. kalo ngeliat di lapangan yah. yang kemaren 2002 ga kena banjir, sekarang kena banjir. yah katanya seh 75% jakarta kena banjir, dari mulai kategori tergenang hingga tenggelam dlm arti yang sebenerna. katanya kan ini banjir besar yang 5 tahun sekali, 2012 bakalan lebih parah lagi ga yah. mungkin kalo ga segera di atasi, yah kira2 beberapa puluh tahun lagi jakarta tenggelam total lah...
ps: kenapa ui ga libur yah? kenapa sekolah2 yang gw tempati dari dulu ga pernah libur kalo banjir. hiks3
Thursday, February 01, 2007
curcol di pagi hari
Banyak banget yang gw rasain sekarang.
Dari sebel sama denise karena dia ga mikirin workersnya dengan beres, yah, tentunya gw mikirin diri gw sendiri lah
Dari anxious how to tell her i’m gonna out
Dari kemaren pengalaman dinner ama melwin and seine mutter di dapur bali, yang bikin gw mikir, gila.. gw kenapa ya.. ato mungkin.. lebih ke arah, kok kayanya tina negatif attitude ke gw. Tapi engga juga sih. Ada beberapa hal yang bikin gw begitu, ada juga beberapa hal yang bikin gw bilang, well, it’s understandable she behaved that way. Misalnya, bahasa inggrisnya kurang lancar, jadi miscommunication. Or emang gw yang nervous, walo gw ga begitu ngerasain juga. Thank god, melwin orangnya easy going banget. Or emang gw aja yang neting. Tapi kok gw jadi suka mikir kok seringnya gw yang neting. Jadi sebenernya gw yang neting or orang laen yang bikin gw neting?
Jadi inget kata2 aya. Walo kita dah berubah, tapi sikap orang laen ga berubah. Walo kita udah usaha be nice tapi orang laen masih ga accept kita, yah, gimana kita mau grow? Yah down lagi lah. Feel worthless. Is that the main topic here?
Gw mungkin sekarang lagi masa down. Lagi bagian depressive episodes.
Trus.. sebenernya ini (lagi-lagi) tentang my own view of my physical appearance sih. Sometimes I feel like I’ve fully accepted it. But still there are times, kayanya gw ngerasa, ih gw ga cantik. Well.. gimana ya ngomongnya. Kaya tadi aja gw ngobrol ama temen chat, si gokhan, gw kasih tunjuk poto gw ama temen2. dia minta dikenalin ke santi. Terus terang, emang gw jealous ama santi. Cantik, easy going, pinter, tajir. Siapa yang ga mau kaya dia coba. Well.. I have my other opinion about her, like her vision about material things. But still, she’s a great person overall. In and outside. Ini nih, fenomena orang yang minder karena physical appearance, karena no matter how hard I try, I end up losing. Is it about losing? Yes, losing people’s attention. Is it now about attention? Not that kind of public attention. Mere acceptance. And what kind of acceptance here? Acceptance from people you just got to know.
I try quite well with Daud. David, the Kebab guy. He’s a nice person. And I can talk to him freely. I like myself when I talk to him. He sees me like he sees anyone else. Or Melwin. He’s nice to me, again, he sees me like he does anyone else. Or my friends at work. I like them. They accept me cuz I know I treat them well. I treat them as friends, cuz I think of them as friends. That’s what I want. I treat people as I want to be treated. So whats wrong if I try but some just don’t accept me? Is it me? Or is it them? Or is it their attitudes towards me, or people like me?
And why does this bother me so much?
Because I know, this matters to me. I can’t ignore it. Or compensate my thoughts by studying. Because I end up feeling down and demotivated.
Dulu, pelarian gw ke Tuhan. Tapi sekarang view gw tentang Tuhan aja udah beda banget.
Communication. That’s my probs. I believe we need god, cuz we think he accepts us for who we are, unconditionally. And god serves as a friend, when you need one, and you can’t seem to find any, who will understand you. That’s what you think. That’s what I think. I confess that I fear what my friends will see me, the whole me. Not a good idea. I know.
Girls, just wanna tell you. I need a friend. A friend who will understand me. Sounds selfish I know. I try to understand people. And sometimes they understand me. We accept each other. But there are some that don’t. and it breaks my heart. Because I’m still learning to live. To deal with my own feelings towards myself. Deal with my attitudes toward other people. I know you understand me. And I become free when I’m with you all. That’s why I wanna be with you. You give me strength now I know I do have. But I can’t always rely on you. I have to stand up for myself. I will still try, though I know I should be aware that I might lose again.
Dari sebel sama denise karena dia ga mikirin workersnya dengan beres, yah, tentunya gw mikirin diri gw sendiri lah
Dari anxious how to tell her i’m gonna out
Dari kemaren pengalaman dinner ama melwin and seine mutter di dapur bali, yang bikin gw mikir, gila.. gw kenapa ya.. ato mungkin.. lebih ke arah, kok kayanya tina negatif attitude ke gw. Tapi engga juga sih. Ada beberapa hal yang bikin gw begitu, ada juga beberapa hal yang bikin gw bilang, well, it’s understandable she behaved that way. Misalnya, bahasa inggrisnya kurang lancar, jadi miscommunication. Or emang gw yang nervous, walo gw ga begitu ngerasain juga. Thank god, melwin orangnya easy going banget. Or emang gw aja yang neting. Tapi kok gw jadi suka mikir kok seringnya gw yang neting. Jadi sebenernya gw yang neting or orang laen yang bikin gw neting?
Jadi inget kata2 aya. Walo kita dah berubah, tapi sikap orang laen ga berubah. Walo kita udah usaha be nice tapi orang laen masih ga accept kita, yah, gimana kita mau grow? Yah down lagi lah. Feel worthless. Is that the main topic here?
Gw mungkin sekarang lagi masa down. Lagi bagian depressive episodes.
Trus.. sebenernya ini (lagi-lagi) tentang my own view of my physical appearance sih. Sometimes I feel like I’ve fully accepted it. But still there are times, kayanya gw ngerasa, ih gw ga cantik. Well.. gimana ya ngomongnya. Kaya tadi aja gw ngobrol ama temen chat, si gokhan, gw kasih tunjuk poto gw ama temen2. dia minta dikenalin ke santi. Terus terang, emang gw jealous ama santi. Cantik, easy going, pinter, tajir. Siapa yang ga mau kaya dia coba. Well.. I have my other opinion about her, like her vision about material things. But still, she’s a great person overall. In and outside. Ini nih, fenomena orang yang minder karena physical appearance, karena no matter how hard I try, I end up losing. Is it about losing? Yes, losing people’s attention. Is it now about attention? Not that kind of public attention. Mere acceptance. And what kind of acceptance here? Acceptance from people you just got to know.
I try quite well with Daud. David, the Kebab guy. He’s a nice person. And I can talk to him freely. I like myself when I talk to him. He sees me like he sees anyone else. Or Melwin. He’s nice to me, again, he sees me like he does anyone else. Or my friends at work. I like them. They accept me cuz I know I treat them well. I treat them as friends, cuz I think of them as friends. That’s what I want. I treat people as I want to be treated. So whats wrong if I try but some just don’t accept me? Is it me? Or is it them? Or is it their attitudes towards me, or people like me?
And why does this bother me so much?
Because I know, this matters to me. I can’t ignore it. Or compensate my thoughts by studying. Because I end up feeling down and demotivated.
Dulu, pelarian gw ke Tuhan. Tapi sekarang view gw tentang Tuhan aja udah beda banget.
Communication. That’s my probs. I believe we need god, cuz we think he accepts us for who we are, unconditionally. And god serves as a friend, when you need one, and you can’t seem to find any, who will understand you. That’s what you think. That’s what I think. I confess that I fear what my friends will see me, the whole me. Not a good idea. I know.
Girls, just wanna tell you. I need a friend. A friend who will understand me. Sounds selfish I know. I try to understand people. And sometimes they understand me. We accept each other. But there are some that don’t. and it breaks my heart. Because I’m still learning to live. To deal with my own feelings towards myself. Deal with my attitudes toward other people. I know you understand me. And I become free when I’m with you all. That’s why I wanna be with you. You give me strength now I know I do have. But I can’t always rely on you. I have to stand up for myself. I will still try, though I know I should be aware that I might lose again.
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